Michael isn't himself anymore in my head or irl!

Well,first I mean in my head he isn't the same anymore. He's taken on the role of Maestro now,and that's trouble. Before he was just Daryl Boo. Michael from the BAD era blending in with the present and learning how to be a "good boy" or good spirit. Well,he has become corrupt from Jesus and from me. He listens to my evil side and to Satan in my head all the time now. Infact,I think Satan or my evil side came out to play because of Daryl/Michael! Whatever the case,I'm not happy. I'm boarderline suicidal. I want to take a bunch of pills and just go to sleep forever! I just don't think I can take this sadness. Daryl broke my heart when he started listening and getting in my personal drama with Satan telling him about my life or what he thought about my looks. This made me un-trust him completely. I don't like Satan or evil people who make fun of me and get in my drama. I hate these kinds of people! They are distasteful. I just get annoyed by them. Da…

Is it a ghost of jealousy?! :O Spiritual attachment with Michael Jackson!

Lord I hope he doesn't send me to hell for all this,but I am scared.
I HAVE SPIRIT ATTACHMENT not mental illness!
I conjured up a spirit of a MJ fan or an impersonator/double.
Maybe even the real Michael? :o
The voices are threatening me a lot lately and causing me pins and needles effects that others don't have!

Like this...

Daryl: "Shut up Trin before I hurt you!"

*Feels pins and needles pricking my skin*

Yeah,I think I have a ghost or really bad disorder. But what? Schizo-effective Disorder is this bad?
Once I saw a image of a bug and freaked out! It looked real. Like it was there.
I was told to not play or fuck around with MJ in my head. *Cries* But he is so cool! :(
I looked up my symptoms,and true indeed I have a ghost and some telepathic bond with said ghost.
(ohh trippy!)
I read this article on spirits:
And this one:
I swear the later…

My life at Tender Mercies Inc (part 2)

It's been almost 5 years since I been here at Tender Mercies Inc. Since being here,all I get now is drama! Drama from residents and surrounding negro people in the area,who dwell outdoors all hours just to see if I am gonna "come out and kill or kick their asses". I refuse to do any of it.  I got people talking about I smell like Haywood Dixon the RSW. I got women like Yvonne Thompson,Ludell Ruffin,and Paula in room 212,who instigate in my life to others and to God. Men like Lewis Fisher and others at Harkavey Hall,Haven,and Dana love to instigate and get in my online life. It's terrible. Sometimes I wish I hadn't seen the ad for this place back in 2013 at the Dropp Inn,when I was homeless. I just had a feeling it be a nice place for a few years. It has been,but now I need to get myself up and get my own place and get a better life. Even if I have to go back to a group home,I hope to find a nice place to go. I wanted to get me a furnished apartment for $450 to $…

My life at Tender Mercies Inc!

What is Tender Mercies Inc? It is a place for the mentally handicap. Homeless adults with a history of mental and social illness. It is located in Cincinnati,Ohio. It houses over 200 people in the downtown Cincinnati area. I have been there for over three years now. And it's been rough but a journey into myself ,and into my future!

Since I been here it hasn't been so pleasant. The food is served by a group of volunteers in a potluck-style setting. And often we have the same food on repeat bi-monthly.
The toilets and showers are old and need repair. In fact often they are filled with toilet paper and stains and all kinda of crap. The janitors here do a good job but they love to extort a person behind their backs. I have a bad habit of pooping on the seat of the toilets when I pee. I just fart and bam! I've tried to help it but it's an annoyance to others here now. So much so I get called names by staff and other residents who haven't matured in the mind enough.

Gossip folks!

Not just a song by Missy Elliott,my voices are turning into some odd gossiping male spirits! They are not nice at all. They even attempt to fornicate with me at will! They try and control and scare me. I've been told I am insane or have some evil spirit trying to attach itself to me on a plane of his own reality.
Maybe,but it's a challenge that never ends. Praying does help,but only for a moment. Medicine does not help at all! In fact,it never did. And you may say that to keep taking it will show improvement,to me that's bull. What does help is some true communication and some basic interference. Something to hush the voices. Something like well more gossip or just some everyday chit chat.

Remembering my mom!

My voices are telling me things about her like they are angels or demons.
And it's hard to deal with.  Mom is dying and although alive,I have made her memorial early.
I will edit it later.
It's been almost three years since I have her at the hospice. I have been avoiding her,cause I feel like I failed her.
I dont have the grandkids she wanted or have I finished school yet.
But I am trying?
I am!
And I put on weight instead of loosing.
Also,this is as far I got in life. Living at Tender Mercies on my own earned disability funds.
She was too. Living the same. I guess it's better than nothing?
Good thing is I got to see mom before dying. I will see her again on Sunday unless she passes.
I will take a cab out there this time.
I also may have to buy her headstone for around hundred dollars.
Hopefully,I will have enough funds.
I will truly miss her. All the good times. All the love. Good bye mom. See you in heaven someday! <3